


(to the tune of Mr. Sandman:) Mr. Bee Man, Here is Your Drink

by putyourpantson



Category: Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children - Ransom Riggs
Genre: Coffee Shop, F/M, Hugh refuses to give his name and thus Fiona refuses to give her number, M/M, MPHFPC Big Bang 2020, Multi, perhaps a bit ooc? idk
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-29
Updated: 2020-11-29
Packaged: 2021-03-09 17:48:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,558
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27780262
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/putyourpantson/pseuds/putyourpantson
Summary: If Fiona had known before she took the job as a barista at Peculiar Brew that every day she would have to deal with an upsettingly cute and annoying customer with a bee obsession, she might’ve run screaming in the opposite direction.
Relationships: Enoch O'Connor/Horace Somnusson, Hugh Apiston/Fiona Frauenfeld, Lilly/Millard Nullings
Comments: 1
Kudos: 19





	(to the tune of Mr. Sandman:) Mr. Bee Man, Here is Your Drink

If Fiona had known before she took the job as a barista at Peculiar Brew that every day she would have to deal with an upsettingly cute and annoying customer with a bee obsession, she might’ve run screaming in the opposite direction.

However, Fiona had not known, so there she sat waiting for him to finalize his order. He clutched his small notebook and smiled up at her. “I’ll take an iced ristretto 10 shot, venti, with breve, 5 pump vanilla, 7 pump caramel, 4 Splenda, poured, not shaken. And one black coffee, I guess.”

Fiona already felt her eyebrows raising high above her dark hairline. “Coming right up. What’s the name this time?” Her voice still felt shaky, even after all the time she’d spent relearning to talk. 

“Doctor Bee Man for the iced, Millard for the black.” He made another insufferable grin at her.

Fiona, although she tried her damndest not to, smiled a bit back. “Is that your name? Mr. Millard Bee Man?” the customer had never given her his real name, even in all these months of coming here.

“That’s  _ Doctor _ to you,” he was leaning on the counter on his elbows, a playful smirk still on his face. Fiona made a show of fake realization as she made his weird as heck order.

“Doctor? Who’d have known, between the mad scientist goggles and the obsession with bees?” Fiona sent a silent thanks to Emma for teaching her how to sound sarcastic and talk and banter.

Bee Man just kept on smiling. “Hmmm. A wonder. And besides, my name isn’t Millard. He’s my friend over in the corner there,” he gestured to a nicely dressed man in the back. He was sitting and talking to Lily, another regular at the shop, and a rather good friend of Fiona’s. “He’s a bit of a pain if I’m gonna be honest.”

“And you aren’t?” Fiona teased back. She was half-way done with his drink, and thanking any above powers she could that Emma still refused to fire her after all this time. “Those are some bold words coming from someone who still won’t give me his first name.”

“And yet you still willingly make my drinks for me,” Bee Man sighed as he shook his head. “I guess you really will never know my name.”

“I  _ could _ just ask Lily,” Fiona pointed out as she nodded over to Lily, who sat close to Millard. Millard seemed to be staring in awe at Lily. Fiona looked back down to her drink making.

“But that wouldn’t be as fun,” Doctor Bee whined. “But if you gave me your number...I would be more than willing to give you my name.”

Fiona just barely managed to contain her own groan. Somehow they always ended up here. “Well, too bad. I don’t give my phone number to strangers.”

“Awh, c’mon, it’d be a fun way to learn my name!” Bee Man was leaning forward on the counter.

“Mmm...no. “ the two of them were at a stalemate. The godforsaken coffee was done, so Fiona poured out another black coffee and purposely stood at the side like she didn’t notice Bee Man. “Dictator Bee Man and Millard!”

Bee Man smiled and rolled his eyes before walking to where Fiona was to receive his order.

Fiona handed the drinks to Bee Guy. “Here are your drinks. Buh-Bye.”

“Until we meet again,” he said, grinning.

“I just don’t understand,” Horace groaned to Fiona about thirty minutes later, once his shift had started and he had sat himself on the counter already. “Why does he have to sit so close to me?” The boy in question was some guy from Horace’s college Anatomy class, who had a rather emo/gothy/skater (Fiona could never truly tell the difference) vibe and rode a skateboard around. Normally, Fiona wouldn’t pay a guy like that any attention, but when your coworker/best friend complained about him nonstop...well, suffice it to say she did pay him more attention than the average customer when he came into the shop. 

“In class or here?” Fiona asked, already knowing the answer. Horace was a disaster and often needed to vent these feelings to Fiona. 

“Both! And normally, I wouldn’t go for these kinds of guys, but here we are! Horace Somnusson, fashion icon, falls in love with an absolute disaster boy who can't even do his makeup right!" Fiona allowed herself a small giggle as she crouched behind the counter to grab more cups. “Don’t you laugh at my pain, Fee, it’s horrible!”

“Eh,” Fiona straightened and put the cups away next to the machines. “At least you know his name.”

“Oh yeah, how’s it going with Bee Boy?” Horace stopped kicking his legs as Fiona glared at him as she still was trying to get some work done.

“Apparently it’s  _ Doctor Bee Man, _ and he’s still a jerk,” Fiona said in a practiced monotone. “Now get down from there, Horace, and get to work.” 

“Why? There’s no one here anyways,” Horace may have thought this was a brilliant comeback, but fate had decided against him as the door gently opened and a guy with dirty blond hair, a dirty face, and a scowl entered the shop. His eyes fell on Horace, who faced away from him, and his face morphed into something that resembled a blushing smile. 

Fiona grinned at Horace. “I’ll be back in a second, I need to clock out.”

“Ugh, fine. But I’ll-”

Horace was interrupted by Enoch. “That’s a health and safety violation, you know.”

There was only a second of silence before Horace yelled “Really, Fee?” and Fiona only laughed.

The next day, at the same exact time as yesterday, Bee Boy came in. Fiona groaned as he entered the shop, and he grinned. “What? Not happy to see me?” 

“Well,  _ seeing _ as I see you everyday, it gets to be tiring.” Fiona said, rolling her eyes. “What can I get you?” 

“Your number,” he said, already doing his normal stance of leaning on the counter. Fiona only rolled her eyes and followed suit. 

“Need your real name for that, Bee Boy.” Fiona reminded him. “Besides, I also need your order.” 

“Please, please.  _ Doctor _ Bee Boy.” He gave her another smile. “And that’ll be a vanilla latte.” He was already sitting at a bar stool at the counter. 

“Nothing fancy today, huh?” Fiona teased him, snatching up a cup to write it down. “And what’ll the name be?”

“Hmm...how about Doctor Apiston?” Fiona turned around, starting to make his drink order. “Figured you’d need a hint of my name.” Fiona didn’t turn back around, but she could feel his smile. 

“Doctor Apiston, coming right up.”

And so it went for weeks on end. Apiston would come in, order some drink, and sit down. Fiona would try to get his name, he'd try to get her number. After that, Horace would come in for his shift, and Enoch would swing around. (And if during the month of June, Enoch had a bisexual and trans pin and Horace had what we like to call a ‘gay panic’...well that was another story of it's own.)

After roughly two more months of this, Fiona was starting to wear down. She was shocking herself with how often she looked forward to Apiston’s visits, and she wanted his name, if only to actually hand over her number.

Yet she refused to call it a crush until he gave her his first name. 

Their seemingly never-ending schedule of coffee, offers, and refusal only ended one day when Millard, Apiston’s friend from before, came in around the time that Apiston normally would. 

“He’s sick,” Millard explained apologetically. “I am so sorry, but he wanted me to hand this to you, no matter  _ how many times I told him _ you’re not obligated to-”

“Who?” Fiona asked it casually like she had forgotten. Millard waved his hand around absently.

“Oh, you know. Hugh.” Millard realized his mistake a minute too late, and he clamped his hand over his mouth. “I should not have said that, I should not have-”

“Relax, it wasn’t really your fault,” Fiona grinned. Hugh. What an odd name to call her crush. “See you around, Millard.”

The note, once she looked at it, only contained a quick (and rather cocky) apology and a promise to return tomorrow...along with his order for the next day.

"He did what?" Horace said, nearly falling from the counter in his excitement. "And his name is Hugh? Huh, I could've sworn I heard that name before somewhere..." Horace trailed off before shaking it off. "Well? You could ask him out now!"

Fiona smirked. "Oh, I will. Unlike someone who's been too shy to ask his four-month-long crush out the entire time-" Horace only spluttered, and the bell above the door rang again. "Good luck!" Fiona called, heading to the back. (Though she knew for a fact that Enoch was going to confess, and she wanted to see it...She also knew they would want some privacy. Thus, she left them.)

The next day, as soon as Hugh entered the shop, his coffee was already ready, complete with whipped cream on the top, and his full name, Doctor Hugh Apiston, written on the side. Along with a smiley face, and finally...Fiona's number.

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you enjoyed!! :)
> 
> For this big bang, my artist was: https://bakerstreetpeculiar.tumblr.com/ !! Go check em out!!! (not sure if they've posted the art yet tho lol)


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